I reminded myself recently of the PWH anniversary which is Tuesday. I planned an awesome filler, but since I’m so dang indecisive, I just don’t know what the plot should be of. A remake of the first episode or a Celebrity Chaos 3?
Vote in the comments because polls are complicated! :D
After Kyan runs into Perez Hilton at a local Starbucks, he gets inspired to make his own blog. But to Kyan, making a blog is harder than it looks.
*9 A.M. Starbucks Coffee*
*dark PT Cruiser pulls up wildly in parking lot*
Kyan – *gets out of car, tired* I need a coffee.
*paparazzi ambushes Kyan, camera flashing everywhere he turns, interviewers asking questions*
Paparazzo – KYAN! YOU’RE NOT WEARING ANY MAKEUP!
Kyan – I never wear makeup..
Paparazzo – Oh, you’ve always been this ugly?
Kyan – *grunts, walks one step forward*
*paparazzi follows + surrounds him*
Kyan – WOULD YOU GET OUT OF MY FACE!
Kyan – *death stares Paparazzo*
Paparazzo – *looks at camera* This is SO going on TMZ! *skips away along with paparazzi*
Kyan – *looks up at sign* Starbucks Coffee, here I come! *run-walks to counter* CHARISMA!
Charisma – *sleeping, head on counter*
Kyan – *pulls Charisma’s head up by the hair, smacks him*
Charisma – *immediately wakes* GAH! Oh hey there, Kyan.
Kyan – Give me the usual on my tab.
Charisma – Chocolaty chip with whipped cream?
Kyan – Correct.
Charisma – Alright, that’s possible. *whispers, points at table* By the way, Perez Hilton is sitting right there.
Kyan – *turns around, squeels, skips to Perez’s table, stares at him*
Perez – *typing on laptop, looks up at Kyan* Can I help you?
Kyan – YOU’RE FAMOUS! The only other famous person I met was Pink! :D
Perez – That’s nice. Can you like leave?
Kyan – No. *smiles*
Perez – *clears throat, ignores Kyan, goes back to staring at his monitor*
Kyan – You’re one of those people that publicly write on their laptops due to the Wi-Fi in Starbucks?
Perez – Mhm.
Kyan – You inspire me for some reason. I want to make a blog like yours! :D
Perez – All I do is trash-talk celebrities. My reputation is already notorious. You have a clear slate to have a good one.
Kyan – Yeah, yeah, whatever. I just wanted to meet you! :D
Perez – ABDUL!
*big, strong man carries Kyan towards the door*
Kyan – WAIT, WAIT!
Abdul – What?
Kyan – Can you get me my Chocolaty Chip?
Abdul – *turns, goes over to counter, grabs Chocolaty Chip, hands to Kyan who’s over his shoulder*
Kyan – Thank you! :D
Abdul – You’re welcome. Now be gone with you. *throws Kyan towards the door*
Kyan – *innocently prances out the door*
*at Kyan’s home – 6:00 pm*
Kyan – *Sits down infront of laptop, turns it on, cracks knuckles* Okay, here we going Kyan. Our journey to becoming a blogging star starts right here, *looks around* in this dank and dark room, *sniffs air* that smells like off cheese and dying skin cells. *shudders* Okay so lets start up the internet. Lets see…I think i move the mouse and – Oh, yes that worked. Move the little pointer to the internet icon and *click*…*click*… It’s not working? *click* *double-click, internet starts* Woo! Go Kyan! Now to start up my new- *pop-up demanding to connect to dial-up* This might be harder than I first thought Mr. Perez.
Perez – *mumbles, taped up in corner*
Kyan – Shh, shh, shh..*places finger up to Perez’s mouth* I’ll give you a chocolate if you show me how to blog? *waves candy infront of Perez*
Kyan – *staring at screen* Ok, so I click on this?
Perez – *mumbles through taped mouth, kneeling next to Kyan*
Kyan – And I click on this one, right?
Perez – *more mumbles*
Kyan – Ahuh. Oh, wait, wait it’s asking me if I agree to the terms. Do I accept without reading them?
Perez – *mumble*
Kyan – Okay. If you say so. *clicks agree*
*computer message: “Congratualations! You now have an email!”
Kyan – *giggles, claps* Oh you’re a good boy Mr. Perez! Such a good boy. *pats Perez’s hair*
Perez – *rolls on back*
Kyan – *rubs Perez’s stomach* Would you like your chocolate now? *pulls down tape, places a piece of chocolate into his mouth, puts back tape*
Perez – *chews chocolate, sits happily*
Perez – *asleep on floor*
Kyan – *slumped over in chair* WordPress? No, Blogger. Blogger has epicer themes that are difficult to install. *clicks a million times* Work darnit, work! Alright, next. Blog title? Oh, what should I call it? “Kyan’s Cool Beans Blog!” :D Perfect! It’s charming, food-like, sounds cool, and it has my name in it! Everything you could ever want from a name. Uh, what’s this? Tagline?
Kyan – Alright, I’m done! It’s complete! Are you proud of me Perez, are you proud of me?
Perez – *unconscious on floor*
Kyan – *bends down, removes tape from mouth* :3 Naw…He’s drooling. Sleep tight my love. *pecks Perez’s cheek, yawn, stretch* Boy, am I tired. Time for a coffee!
Kyan – *sitting at random table, sipping Chocolaty Chip, writing on laptop* ..Still thinking of what to write about. *sigh* Cats? Politics? *sleeps on table*
Kyan – *drooling on table, still asleep*
Minotaur – *zaps table*
Kyan – *wakes up, yawns* I should write about politics.
Ryku – *clears throat* Why weren’t you at work today? It was awkward. Like Season One all over again but with Zey and without the the annoying guests.
Kyan – I was making my blog. D:
Ryku – That’s not the only thing we’re mad about. Check your blog.
Kyan – *goes to blog’s URL, reads latest post* Stupid, Smelly Co-Hosts by Kyan, TOTALLY not Perez Hilton who DIDN’T hack this. Oh my golly, these guys are so annoying. They are ugly and weird. Especially that one nerdy guy named Ryku or something. There’s also this green haired kid named Minotaur. Oh boy, he sure is fat! I also hate Zey, but I don’t know enough about him to make fun of him, if he IS even a boy.
Zey – Not cool, man.
Kyan – I didn’t write this! D:
Minotaur – I believe him.
Ryku – *turns to Mino* Why?
Minotaur – Kyan is computer illiterate. Someone must’ve hacked him and wrote that.
Ryku – But who? WHO I ASK?
Perez – *walks through the door* That’s right! I did it!
Charisma – Perez, why would you do such a thing? D:
Perez – Quiet, Charisma. I have to explain. *takes a deep breath* Kyan’s annoying and I hate all of you.
Minotaur – Get a life.
Perez – You can’t tell me what to do. I could write negative reviews about celebrities on the internet all I wa-
Minotaur – GET A LIFE.
Perez – Gettin’ one! Come on, Abdul, we’re outta here! *skips out of Starbucks*
Minotaur – Why does it seem like we’re making so many enemies this season?